I don’t mean the sponsor of Eclectic Tech — I mean OUR sponsor. Every gerbil, human, fish, amoeba, building, dishwasher, diamond ring, space shuttle, barrel of oil — ALL of us.

I’d like to make a multi-faceted argument, so I may explain an awe of the relationship between the planet we live on and our people, our companion animals, our vegetation, and our creations. I can look at it from theology, from philosophy, and from a pseudo-scientific standpoint.

Someone said that mankind owes its entire existence to a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains. I don’t know how many people really think about that statement. I want you to really think about that statement. We owe our existence, our persistence, and every one of our inventions to a layer of fertile soil and the fact that it rains water and not ammonia. Look at what other planets have for ice, and feel lucky.

On theology and as an Interfaith minister, I want to make a statement about humanity’s neglect of our relationship with the Earth: We wave a book — either a most holy book or the greatest work of fiction ever — that we will gladly interpret as granting the God-given right to abuse the planet and its creatures, as if that’s a good excuse for our neglect. I suggest that everyone reread that section. We were not appointed by any God to be the despoilers and abusers of the earth, but the caretakers, the tenders, the shepherds. Not to be above, but to be in love with every critter, and take loving care thereof (because one of the most inoffensive statements I’ve ever heard in trying to define “god” is that “god is love”). Those of us who don’t have those books usually have a similar idea of our relationship with the earth and its creations. It’s amazing how many religions incorporate not only gratitude to their powers-that-be, but to the earth and its children. And some go so far as to attribute spirit to all things, whether or not they are created by mankind. Above all, through the ages we have noticed and respected the fickle relationship between ourselves and our environment.

Oil, and thus gasoline and propane, plastics, and petroleum jelly, are taken from the veins of the earth like blood from a donor. We who would consider it unjustifiable to strap another human into a chair and bleed them day in and day out for years upon years without consent are doing this to our Earth. Our planet. By our, I mean every insect, every human, every fax machine, every toaster, every car, every tree.

The cluelessness astounds me. The neglect frightens me.

Somewhere in this terrifying rollercoaster of how we treat our planet, I wish someone had the ability to push the red button that makes the ride stop. But we don’t. As individuals, we can’t push that red button. But we can refuse to take that ride.

It’s not enough to watch the rollercoaster of destruction. We have to run around the amusement park planting trees, picking up litter, playing less games, winning less “prizes” that we can’t take into the afterlife anyway.

There is only one thing that will make a difference beyond this lifetime — relationships. Whether you believe in absolute blackness after the flesh dies, whether you believe in Heaven, or reincarnation — the lives you touch will live beyond your time, just as those who are gone have touched your life. And relationships can be relatively carbon neutral. If we spend our time building dreams for the bigger prize of love — and here we are back at god again — we can consume less, plant more, and maybe other people will decide it’s more fun doing what we do than to embark on that terrifying ride that ruins our planet.

Everything has a spirit, because everything, and I mean everything we surround ourself with, is a part of us. We breathe the same air. We eat the same carbon. My molecules are yours. My energy is yours. My spirit is yours. WE are Mother Earth. Every lightbulb. Every stone. Every living, inanimate, and dead being on the planet. We are Mother Earth. Why are we killing ourselves?

I run this one-woman minority-owned company called Eclectic Tech. Started out with the intention of doing whatever it takes to help people (with technology). Found that most people need help with websites, so that’s my primary selling point and like any other company, I have to flaunt it.

I do my best to make sure I don’t bleed my clients for every cent they have. Came up with a great way to picture it — sudden inspiration in a restaurant in Warwick: “Free your website from the Bastille! Liberate your website from your oppressors!” all in a French-ish accent I like to flatter myself is pretty good. It was a hit. I love making people laugh.

Well, I have yet to find a French person who is offended. I don’t like doing the same schtick twice, but this is certainly my most popular self-aggrandizement. So it stuck — now I run around saying “Liberate your website!” a Whooooooole lot. Usually with the French accent. Because people actively request it. Once I did it in a fake Transylvanian accent “Is your vebmaster sucking you dry??” Did any Transylvanians come out of the woodwork to take offense? There was a room full of about 60 or 70 local business people — no one said anything, a few people laughed, most people smiled.

So, my client Paul Ellis created this Faaaaaabulous commercial for me, inspired by my own inspirations. He has 4 actors do this commercial — 3 “Mexican revolutionaries” and a damsel in distress. Same basic schtick: freedom from your oppressive webmasters. It’s on the radio. It’s on my website. I love the commercial. It’s a work of art. It’s a whole minute-thirty long, you can’t BUY an ad slot like that on the air!

After all my other “revolutionary” spontaneous ads, someone’s taking offense at the commercial. Maybe more than one someone. Because maybe, just maybe, it’s racially biased.

I don’t know who you are, but there’s no racial slurs in the commercial — there’s no vandals or “bad guys” in any of the voices and the webmaster’s race or lifemate are not mentioned. The damsel cries “Help, Help” and the revolutionaries come to tell her about Eclectic Tech and how Eclectic Tech can free her from oppression. I’m not Mexican, so maybe I have no right to portray Mexicans in my advertising any more than I had a right to portray a French revolutionary, or a Transylvanian vampiress. But I grew up the daughter of an Argentinean immigrant. I’m Hispanic. My children are 1/2 Puerto Rican, and all Hispanic. When he described the commercial to me, and I read the script, I thought it was cool. When I heard it I thought it was brilliant.

All of this was probably not an issue until it came time for Paul Ellis to run for Chester Town Supervisor. After all, someone has to find some dirt to fling and get offended — and men aren’t marching after him with torches and pitchforks for the character named “Harry Paratestis” so I guess the next obvious target is my commercial. Gotta get dirt on this man who works himself to the bone, collaborating with everyone on every project, trying to make people laugh, no matter what their color, gender, or who they sleep with. So this man makes me an inspired, funny, and talented commercial, intended for play during a radio COMEDY, and somewhere in the middle of the high sidekick and the dead guy with the dirty name, people can’t seem to locate their sense of humor anymore. It’s with the missing sock, people!

No wonder commercials have to resort to CGI-animated bullfrogs and geckos. People have missed the point, but I’ll let you in on it: The joke is NOT about the revolutionaries. The accents are trite clues that there’s a bigger joke going on. The REAL joke is about web-masters who take advantage of their clients, creating websites no one can touch but them. These people charge either monthly fees or per-change charges for people to keep their websites up to date. And so far, even THEY aren’t taking offense!! No matter what color they are, where their ancestors are from, what language they speak, who they sleep with, or what gender they are, the webmasters have not risen to defend themselves. I believe they have every right to their residual income, and I believe their clients have every right to get fed up with it and choose a different alternative, which I will happily offer them. And I’ll use every historical reference to revolutions and oppression I want — as long as it makes someone giggle — to drive that point home. Robin Hood? Sure! Boston Tea Party? You betcha!! Moses & the Pharaoh? Now you’re talking! “Let my website go!”

I don’t get people. But here’s one Hispanic woman who is saying WTF about this attitude. Do you want to talk about crimes against humanity: Paul Ellis made me laugh! Now there’s a crime — I might live a little longer because I laughed and released some endorphins. If you don’t find it funny, why are you listening? At least I got a good hearty laugh out of the thought of anyone being offended!

I volunteered at Live Earth in New York — I stuck my hand out and pointed to the right recycling bin or composting bin for concert attendees, and stuck my hand in when they messed up, and fixed the problem. I spent about 5.5 hours stationed near concertgoers getting sore feet in the name of raising awareness.

I’m exhausted. More about saving the planet when I’ve got a moment. Take care of the Earth!!

I’ve been working on the Orange Environment website, and one perk is that I’ll have a table at the Earth Day event in Warwick on April 21st.

I’m a very conscientious person, so I have to scrutinize myself to justify being there. When people walk up to my table and ask me why a web designer is there at a booth on Earth Day — what can I say to defend my “position”?

• My office runs either on sunlight from a big bay window or compact fluorescent lights
• I use 100% post-consumer paper
  • loosleaf for client notes

  • multi-use printer/copier paper for my laserjet
• when I get mail or fliers that are only used on one side, I keep them by the phone for quick note jotting.
• when a paper is used on both sides, I recycle it (sometimes shredded first)
• I have a home office only
  • the same heat for my home is heat for my office (the office room adjoins the kitchen; it’s a one-zone house, but at only 830 sqft it should be!)

  • I save on auto fuel & auto wear-n-tear
• I drive a used but still energy-efficient car for business & personal use (1994 honda civic at up to 33mpg)
• I turn the printer off when not in use
• I work by sunlight whenever possible
• I leave any extra computer equipment off whenever possible so only one computer is running the majority of the time
• I use wash-n-wear clothes for the most part
  • the washer is a high-efficiency front-loader rated exceptionally for water efficiency

  • the dryer has a dampness sensor thus is self-regulating
  • I use a scent and dye free detergent
  • I don’t use a fabric softener
• I use refurbished toner cartridges
• we have a duplex printer, and I print on both sides of the page for any multi-page documents
• whenever possible I print 2-up duplex, for reference documentation, because I don’t mind reading tiny print, but I do mind wasting paper
• I save the plastic &/or cellophane windows of envelopes I receive for craft projects (they make great filling for homemade cat toys!)

There are still areas in which I’m a culprit, however. I could (always) do better. We occasionally use whiteboards in my office, and I’m not really believing the EAP certification regarding the inks. I want desperately to know if there’s such a thing as soy laser toner cartridges, or any other alternatives that won’t turn the laser printer into a hunk of waste. I could use dryer balls, and I’m considering that (if they make the dryer even a tad more efficient it’s worth a 1 time expense). I could scold my roommate for leaving the bathroom light on. I printed up letterhead I could hardly afford, it came out lousy, now I have a ton of letterhead that shouldn’t have been printed in the first place, and should have been on recycled stock — live & learn. That letterhead is now the back of any one-page fliers I produce as handouts.

So I guess instead of feeling guilty, I could try to relax and realize that there are a bunch of things about me that cause me to stand out in a crowd of web design/programming professionals that could be considered when positioning myself in the “green” community as well: I’ve been an herbalist for about 15 years, I’m an Interfaith Minister, Reiki master, & Shaman. I guess having a booth isn’t such a bad idea after all!

Preamble: I have decided I don’t like Gallery2 as my portfolio application. I’m going to be working on moving back to PmWiki for my portfolio in the future — so my latest work is not in my portfolio.

I re-created the Business Exchange Network’s website in December, 2006. The old site may still be available. This is a template rather than custom design, however I custom programmed several features for the site, then donated the instructions on how to do it for other sites back at the application project site. This site incorporates a calendar, member business directory, and each member has a profile page that acts as a mini-website for them. Since a few people in the group don’t have websites, this gives them a real place on the web to call home until they decide whether they want a website.

I helped out at KwicTax, LLC - programming a form on the site, adding required fields, and generally making the form and subsequent information revealed after filling out the form behave properly.

An ongoing client is up to her usual beautiful designs - Apryl of Silverflux Design has been outsourcing programming and general geekery and software installations to Eclectic Tech. This week we finished working on the Serendipity bead store website in Canada. My handiwork is the calendar and newsletter subscription integration.

In-progress Sites

Almost completed: Beth Ward of Jaidens Jewels has requested a website redesign and shopping cart. This work is in progress and if you’d like to see it before it’s finished, feel free to email me.

Almost completed: Chris Zino of Zino Technical Services in Bayville, NY has requested a website design and wiki application — he’s absolutely thrilled to be using a wiki and is already creating pages on the site, and I haven’t even gotten around to training him yet! At the time of the writing, we’re still hashing out the logo for his business, and once the logo is decided we may well be changing the colors on the site, but the site is up, works, he’s in business, and his contact info is there if anyone needs home audio installations, networking installation or repair, computer service, or a dozen other techie services on Long Island (Nassau & Suffolk Counties), he’s your guy!

New Client: I’m under contract for the redesign and reworking of Orange Environment’s website. I’ve started working, but there’s nothing to show yet. Orange Environment is a non-profit that has been working to save the open spaces of Orange County, NY for 25 years. This is their 25th Anniversary website overhaul, and this year they’ll be holding an Earth Day celebration on April 21st. Location(s) TBA. If you see my company name at the bottom of the site, then I’ve made progress enough to go live on my work. Until then, if you want to see the development site-in-progress, feel free to email me.

New Client: My newest client is Middletown Community Health Center (MCHC) who has requested a modernization and more features for their website. Again, if my company name is not at the bottom of the page, you’re looking at their old site. Ask me for a URL for their development site-in-progress. As of the time of writing, I haven’t gotten that far yet but work should begin shortly.

I’m personally and professionaly one of the NO!SPEC rebels. I believe that professionals should not hand out creatives (work, sketches, anything that takes substantial time or could be stolen and produced by any kid with an art program) for any client’s job without being under contract to be paid for the work, deposits or down payments optional. This extends to contest work, where dozens of designers are invited to submit finished works in the hope that they will be picked out as the one good enough for the reward.

I’ve been reading and commenting on NO!SPEC articles for a couple months, and now I come across an interesting post on Craigslist:

Date: 2006-07-12

Carnegie Hall Seeks Original Art for Its Playbill Covers!

THEME “Music as a fundamental expression of the human spirit”–using Carnegie Hall’s 2006-2007 season as inspiration. Please visit carnegiehall.org/subscribe for complete season details.

ELIGIBILITY Open to all enrolled students (valid identification required)

STYLE AND MEDIUM Any style and any medium, including painting, drawing, sculpture, photography, and computer-generated art

SUBMISSION REQUIREMENTS jpeg, tiff, or pdf digital format only; file size not to exceed 2 mb; e-mail to artcontest@carnegiehall.org

PRIZES Each of 10 selected entrants will receive $500 and 2 tickets to a performance at Carnegie Hall.

Deadline: August 31, 2006

Selected artists must be living, reside in the United States, provide their Social Security numbers, and sign a release for the use of their work.Winning works will appear on the covers of Carnegie Hall’s concert program books throughout the 2006-2007 season. Please note that while we encourage all forms of artistic expression, some controversial subject matter may not be suitable for publication. Submissions should not be literal representations of musicians appearing at Carnegie Hall. Also note that while artists will retain ownership of their original works, the photographic representation of each winning work will be considered a work made for hire for The Carnegie Hall Corporation (CHC), and CHC will own all copyrights and other rights in it, including, without limitation, the exclusive right to adapt it and to use it for any purpose and in any medium now known or devised in the future, perpetually and throughout the world.

no — it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Compensation: $500 and 2 tickets to a performance at Carnegie Hall

This contest is of course a contest. Carnegie Hall is looking for dozens of people to pour their time into a project, and looking to reward someone and use their work. Only this time there are some key differences. It’s open to students only; not many speculative work contests are only open to valid students. There are 10 prizes — that certainly increases the chances of winning, and means that it’s less likely that there will have been ties for first place and the winner chosen by the flip of a coin. Knowing PlayBills, it’s possible there will be 10 covers printed, and all the winners’ pieces distributed to a very mixed audience (and making a terrific portfolio piece). The prize is pretty fair — they’re giving out a total of $5000 to 10 students — and how many students couldn’t use $500?

Other interesting things to note: It’s mixed media, and there aren’t many chances for students to get that type of money for a media of their choice. It’s not a venue where the student would be needed for branding advice, or future support, unlike logo or website design contests — they need 10 single photos/pictures to print for the program book covers. The work produced by the entrants would be able to be generic and useful for other purposes (unlike a logo or web design).

I’m not saying it’s a good contest; I find it difficult to judge this one. What I am saying is that of the contests I’ve seen, this one is different, more fair, unlikely to hurt Carnegie Hall in the way that most speculative contests I have seen are eventually going to bite the company holding the contest.

Would anyone care to comment on it?

I don’t know what you, the reader, believe in. Right now, our nation struggles with a fundamental question regarding the “face” of what is an acceptable “American family.”

There is the Federal Marriage Amendment, being contemplated for addition into our Constitution. This amendment seeks to limit marriage and any rights resembling those of rights of marriage to couples who are male and female. In other words, it’s to dictate what states can say about marriage between gay couples — which specifies that they may not allow marriage and marital rights. It does away with domestic partnership rights, annuls marriages already consummated, strips many families of privileges they require and depend upon legally and medically.

Historically speaking, the document called the Constitution has been most successful in outlining our rights and freedoms. Whenever we have used it as a document to impose limitations on basic human rights, it has failed.

We also have kept it relatively free of judgement, free of religion. A miracle in a partisan country where one religion or a set of somewhat compatible religions have the power.

Marriage is already a messy “Chinese menu” of personal and private romantic and supportive commitments between individuals, a religious binding oath, and a contractual financial and legal arrangement. Not to mention a component that is a contract with the State, in return for which one gets certain legal and financial rights. Pick and choose any or all of the above for your marriage. To say two men, or two women, can’t make a personal and private romantic or supportive commitment would be absurd — that is something one can’t dictate and needs no contract or sanction and makes marriage a mere formality or a public announcement of the commitment. To say two men or two women — or indeed any number of individuals — can’t enter a contractual financial and legal arrangement is equally absurd and would burst every corporation or partnership in the country leaving us with many sole proprietorships, no clients, etc.

Whenever an argument opposing gay marriage comes about, I hear the protest coming from a religious standpoint, yet the contract of marriage requires no religious component. People can be married by court. Marriage by church is an option that persists for tradition and sentimental or religious reasons, but the two matters (legal or religious marriage) can easily be separated from one another.

Yet most opponents to gay marriage insist on quoting quotes from various interpretations of one religious compendium called the Bible. Someone passed around a counter-quote, “When you take an oath in court, you swear on the Bible to uphold the Constitution” not vice-versa. We are not a nation to uphold the Bible. There are no precedents outlining which religious source we are basing the Constitution on because the Constitution was written with the express intention of separating the impositions of religion from the governance of a nation. Our forefathers had the wisdom, the resentment, the foresight, and the first-hand-experience to know that no one religion was going to get it right, and that individual political freedoms could not be dictated by religious mores.

I am not Christian, or Jewish. I’m not Muslim, nor am I Buddhist. Yet religion surrounds me, infuses me, draws me, defines me, limits me, and expands me. My religion doesn’t have any creeds whatsoever limiting lifetime unions to only man and woman. If your religion says it’s not ok to marry the same sex, then marry only the opposite sex (or change religions), but do not limit my Constitutional freedom to practice my right to personal private commitments, enter into contractual arrangements, to celebrate the religious oaths I may choose to enter into with any gender, or to enter into a legal and financial agreement with my state. Certainly do not try to limit my religious freedoms from within a document sworn to protect them. Your state may not honor my agreements, but the Constitution is not allowed to limit them.